Stop Dimming Your Light to Make Others More Comfortable

There comes a point in all of our lives when we just have to be fully and completely authentic about who we really are. However, far too many of us get caught up in trying to prove ourselves to others and trying to show a more acceptable face to others in order to fit in. This means that people are not truly thriving and living fulfilled lives. What I want to remind you of today is that excellence and greatness comes in many different forms – you can stop dimming your light in order to make others more comfortable. I break this down for my clients when they are looking for personal brand advice and guidance. One of the major blocks to individuals truly harnessing the power of their personal brands worrying about how other people will react to you being your authentic self.

Don’t let anyone try to reduce you to their estimation of what excellence should look like based on their own preconceptions. Many people have a restricted perception of what success looks like and what it should be, thus sustaining certain systems that are not inclusive or dynamic.  Too many people become uncomfortable when someone comes along to disrupt the status quo, however remember most of the greatest people who have ever lived have always done things differently, they have always gone against the constraints of society.
In my own personal experience, I’ve been told: “You charge too much”, “You’re so loud”, “You’re shorter than I expected”, “you’re bossy” and more because people want to devalue me, silence me, make me feel insecure and make me hide and for a while I’ve believed them. In the early years of my business I struggled with pricing, toning down my personality even my appearance (because apparently only tall people can be leaders 😒). But when I realised that all of those questions/comments had absolutely nothing to do with me, I accelerated and truly shined!  They were about other people not being willing to cope with someone’s ability to bring their authentic selves to spaces. 

Don’t let someone’s limited way of thinking, their inability to feel comfortable around your authentic self become how you define yourself! Even learning how to use your voice through public speaking is a way that will enable you to shine and thrive in new spaces. 

When you realise that your greatness is not determined by what others think of you, you’ll thrive. So stop dimming your light to make others more comfortable. It may take a while…but you will learn how to truly be yourself, fully and completely.

Get in touch if you want to improve your personal brand or your public speaking skills.


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  1. Lisa Edwards
    October 15, 2022 / 8:42 pm

    I love this. I’ve dimmed my light for years, because of the reaction people would have to me just being my normal confident self. For a while I thought I must be doing something wrong, if people are turning away. It can’t be them it must be me!

    • October 18, 2022 / 10:19 am

      Thanks for reading and for sharing your thoughts.